Where in your life do you need to detox?

Every few months I do a dreadlock detox and it always feels amazing.  For those who don't have the locks and want to know what the heck I'm talking about, a dreadlock detox is a deep cleanse for your dreads.  For those dready peeps that look after their locks, it's a process whereby we use bicarbonate soda and a bunch of herbs and essential oils and we soak our dreads for around 15-20 minutes to give them a deep cleanse and refresh. The process is done every few months or so and is an extra refresh for your dreads on top of normal shampooing (yes you have to wash dreads).

Anyway, basically you just fill up a blow-up basin with warm water, drop your bi-carb mixture in there and then lie down and drop your dreads into the solution and just hang out there for around 20 minutes swishin your dreads around and getting the cleansing mixture all through them. Then when you're done, you rinse them out and whala fresh, clean, detoxed dreadies.

So anyway, during my most recent dread detox, I was lying there and I began to think about the importance of a good detox and how there are so many places in your life that you can and should detox. I mean we all know and, in fact, have probably done a body detox (colon, liver etc) but what about other types of detox? What about your Soul and Spirit? Your mind?

Have you ever thought about detoxing those areas of your life? What about relationships, social media, digital devices, email, your finances, your wardrobe, your habits?

As a mindset, spiritual and high performance coach, detoxing my mind, soul and spirit forms part of my daily spiritual practice. But recently, I've been focused on detoxing my habits as well. Whether you're aware of it or not, your life is made up of habits, rituals and routines, which you develop both consciously and subconsciously throughout your life. And what I've found over the years of teaching and coaching women, is that often because you have been engaging in these habits and rituals for so long, you've stopped even thinking about them (for example, your nightly binge watch of Netflix after the kids have gone to bed or the half block of chocolate you eat each afternoon to give you an energy boost).

The thing about habits though, is that they actually determine your life and the path you're on, because 'you are what you do each day'. Unfortunately most people don't think of habits in this way, in fact, they don't really think of them at all... simply because they are habits. The thing is though, if you want a kick-ass life, then you're going to need kick-ass habits. And I'm not sure chocolate & Netflix are going to get you a kick-ass life (#nojudgement  #justsayin).

So if you're reading this and you're thinking "actually Kelli, there are some habits I want to ditch", then keep reading and I'll show you where to start.

So to begin to detox your habits, first you need to write a list of all the things you do each day/week. Go on, go write it now.... I'll wait.

Next, ask yourself three questions for each habit or ritual you wrote down:
1. Is this habit good or not so good for me?
2. Does this habit align with my goals and aspirations for my life?
3. Do I actually enjoy this or am I doing it out of pressure (i.e. my partner is a sweet tooth) or unconscious repetition (i.e. I've been doing it so long I don't even think about it anymore)?

Once you've determined this and have created your list of habits that you want to detox, the next step is to determine how your going to go about it. But here's the thing, you've probably heard that it takes 28 days to create a new habit, (21 days to develop it, and 8 days to integrate it).  But, I'm here to tell you, that's a myth. 

It's actually more complicated than this, because creating a new habit, often goes hand-in-hand with stopping an old one (watching less tv/exercising more, eating less chocolate/making healthier food choices, less time on social media/getting more sleep), and so it can often can take longer than 28 days, (especially depending on how long you've been doing it). But, don't fear, because I'm going to give you a quick hack to help you detox your old habits and start to create your new habits, it's called 'temptation bundling'.  

Temptation bundling (first coined by Assistant Professor, Katherine Milkman) is about combining something you want to do with something you have to do. For example, if you love catching up on your favourite show on Netflix but hate walking on the treadmill, then bundle the two together. Only allow yourself to watch your favourite Netflix show while you are doing your daily treadmill walk.  By combining something you want to do with something you know you have to do, you can fast track your 'bad' habit detox and build your new 'good' habit rituals.

This is why temptation bundling is so useful for detoxing old habits and building new ones - 1. you are getting to watch your favourite show on Netflix which becomes the motivation to walk on the treadmill, because it is the instant reward for doing so, and 2. it also helps you to detox the bad habit of watching too much tv, because you are limiting your binge watching to only be permitted whilst you are getting your exercise.  

But fair warning, you have to have pretty significant will-power, because if you let yourself watch your favourite shows outside of your walking time, you will quickly fall off course and fall back into your old habits of watching too much tv and not moving enough.

Now I hear you saying, "but Kelli if I had will-power I wouldn't need temptation bundling, I'd just do my daily walk regardless".  But the difference here is that the will-power you need is in delaying the reward until you are doing the thing you need to do (i.e. walking on the treadmill).  So you have to be strong and have the will-power to stay away from the reward (i.e. Netflix) until you get on that damn treadmill.  

Essentially, the entire premise of temptation bundling is about using something that is instantly gratifying to motivate you in to doing something that is less enjoyable for you. The important thing to remember though, is that you can still fall off the wagon, so you have to really want to change in order for you to build lasting habits. Temptation bundling is a just quick start to get you moving in the right direction on your habit detox.

So there you have it.  By temptation bundling, you are able to detox habits that no longer serve you (or that you at least want to do less of) and build new habits that are more aligned with your dreams and goals for your life.

So what are you going to be detoxing out of your life?  Drop me an email and let me know.  

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